At my wedding shower, I asked the guests to give me their best advice on marriage - what does and doesn't work. My cousin Mary wrote me this note. It's some of the best marriage advice I've ever read anywhere, and I wanted to share it with you...
Be sure you both feel the same way about money, it's use, use of credit from mortgages to credit cards and debt. Many individuals cannot live in continual debt. Their marriages suffer and fail because of this.
Remember, when you are parents, that one is more accepting of one's partner's faults than one's own, so the child most like that partner will be excused and the one like oneself most corrected (and hurt).
Every family is different so your newly formed family cannot be like either of the ones from which you came.
Carefully tend your garden. Root out the weeds. Enjoy the blossoms together!
"In a really good partnership, each gives 75%, neither does a math check!"
Be sure you are both headed for the same destination by the same road. Even teams of horses have to pull together to get anywhere.
Just because a spouse is family doesn't mean one doesn't have to be polite.
"Love conquers all."
"Love means never having to say you are sorry" means trying never to do anything to one another for which you have to be sorry.
2 comments:
Very good advice indeed!
Marriage counselors suggest to make sure you don't make yourself seem needy. Even though almost everyone feels like they need to express to their ex that they cannot live without them, there is no point in telling them that. Instead stay strong, let your ex see that you are okay by yourself, and show everyone around you that you have self confidence and you are happy with yourself. Seeming needy or desperate will only push your ex further away, so make sure to maintain your confidence to get him to crawl right back to you. This is one of the main points you'll learn when you visit the sites I tell you about below. In fact, you'll learn exactly what to say and how to say it. This one little technique alone can plant the idea in your ex's head that they made a mistake. It's very powerful!
http://www.marriage-counselors.net/
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